Comfort And Joy — Online Shopping

Thinking back, the Christmas just past was surprisingly pleasant. Why was that? The answer is not difficult to discover. No shopping. By that I mean no trips to malls, no bustling, shoving crowds, no crazed drivers and teeming parking lots with hordes of people who appear to be drivers-in-training. No exposure to hyper youngsters or harried oldsters, many exhaling miasmas of seasonal germs. No stress, no anxiety, no strain.

I know what you’re thinking — this miserable Scrooge crouched alone by the cold chimney in cold room lit by a 40 watt bulb is just a “Bah, Humbug” kind of guy, buying no presents and getting none. Not so.

I sat in calm luxury singing along with “White Christmas,” “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” “All I Want for Christmas Is You,” “Please Be Home For Christmas” and so on. I was warmed by my own festively alight computer screen, and at my side was a list of things folks in my family and circle wanted. Also on Santa’s list were a few books he wanted that he was pretty sure his family would fail to buy in favor of pajamas and underwear.

I am capable of Luddite moments, or at least contempt for Silicon Valley preening and superiority when so much of what it churns out is little better than faddish gadgets, video games for arrested adolescents, twitter, Xbox, and viral videos of cats and naked Kardashians.

But I have no discouraging words to say about my IPad, IPod or Amazon which make my spirit bright. Without stirring I was able to buy almost everyone’s favorite things — doorbells, sleigh bells and warm woolen mittens. Or in this case, French jam for a favorite neighbor, gemutlich slippers, Fitbit and Awesome Mixtape for my favorite spouse, oddball used books unavailable in Podunk for me.

Only my daughter’s desire for a Japanese shin hanga print forced me to abandon Amazon, but Google obligingly found me a purveyor of just what I was after in Chicago. I placed my order. They called to tell me it was on back order. I dithered before going on to a fallback choice. The nice woman told me to wait a couple days and they’d see if they could get me my first choice. They did, but they had been so accommodating and I was feeling so uncharacteristically openhanded that I bought both.

And here comes the second best thing about ordering everything online with a minimum of hassle. Over the next couple weeks every few days the doorbell would do a little “Silver Bells” rendition and there would be a new parcel delivered to my door by USPS, UPS or FedEx. All arrived intact. All arrived in time. I left the driving to them and sighed a great sigh of relief and contentment as I watched others endure the horror of last minute shopping. “Ho ho ho,” I thought.

I was prompted to write this paean to ecommece and its contents by an incident a few days after Christmas. I was taking my daily stroll and a block up the road I saw a FedEx truck come to a stop. The driver got out and retrieved a large package and jogged it up to the front door. By the time I was nearing him, the home’s front door had opened, the recipient had picked up the box and waved a cheerful “thank you” to the driver.

As I passed the trucks open window, he was back in his seat and filling in a note on a clipboard and I paused to say to him, “ There aren’t too many businesses where people are so happy to see you coming.” The driver smiled and nodded and tootled off down the road to cheer up the next customer.

But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight, “Merry Christmas to all and to all a pleasant online shopping experience with delivery directly to your doorstep.” Goodnight, what an amazing world we live in.

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